Your Erroneous Zones by Dr. Wayne Dyer is an excellent personal development book that talks about the behavioral patterns and habits of thinking that are considered self-destructive and “erroneous”, and that lead to an unhappy life. The book aims to assist in eliminating these negative barriers to happiness and in taking control over your own thoughts and emotions. In this post, I’ll be sharing 7 key points from the book that are worth pondering upon, and can potentially inspire self-introspection and reflection. These key points can be considered as a summary of how it is to live an authentic life according to Dr. Wayne Dyer. Let’s begin 🙂
1. Your true intelligence is measured by your own ability to take charge of your own self and maintain your happiness regardless of what comes to your life.
Contrary to the common tendency to measure intelligence based on how much knowledge you have or degrees you hold, Dr. Dyer pointed out how the true intelligence of a person lies in being able to maintain a happy life in every moment of living and being effective at handling himself in trying circumstances. In short, your level of emotional maturity and how happy you are now are what truly make you an intelligent person.
2. You can control your emotions because you can control your thoughts.
Emotions are just reactions to your chosen thoughts. By choosing thoughts that are constructive and positive, you are creating positive emotions for yourself. It’s what you think or don’t think that will make you happy or unhappy. This is also why negative things that you do not know about or you do not entertain in your mind will not have the ability to hurt you and make you feel bad.
3. In life, growth is inevitable.
Everything that is alive is constantly changing, including you. You are naturally evolving, always a work-in-progress. Improving yourself is a continuous thing, not because you are incomplete, but because life naturally goes through a process of evolution. So there’s no need to beat yourself up for not being all that you will ever be in any moment, but instead you can just embrace your own natural becoming and perfect unfolding.
4. Love is your willingness to allow others to be who they are choosing to be, without demanding that they do differently to satisfy you or make you happy.
You are able to love others by loving yourself first. Because when you love yourself, you wouldn’t let your happiness depend on what others do or don’t do. You will know your own worth and will prioritize feeling good rather than insisting that others be different or be doing things for you. You are able to give them the freedom to be who they are because you are loving yourself, and therefore have enough love to give to others as well. What others do or don’t do won’t bother you anymore because your own self-love is enough and intact even before they came into your experience.
5. There will always be people who will disapprove of you no matter what you do.
You cannot please everyone and it is a natural thing to have a 50/50 approval rate on every view or opinion there is. By always being authentic and honest with yourself, and not needing the approval of anyone for you to be happy, you will then experience freedom and complete control for how you want to feel. The acceptance of this disapproval from others will eliminate any negative feeling about the differing opinions and conclusions of other people, who are all entitled to freely choose their own points of view. Your sense of self will not be relying on anything external, but instead be something solid and stable from within you.
6. Successful relationships require two people who are each independent and responsible for their own happiness.
Relationships that are considered successful are ones in which one individual is not depending on another for the way he or she feels, but rather both are coming into the relationship with happiness, clarity and stability already inside of them. In this way, there will be a mutual sharing of happiness and positive energies, both adding to the well-being of each another.
7. Anger is always a choice.
You are always choosing either to be caught up in the feeling of anger or to accept something that you cannot change in the moment. Know that the emotion of anger towards someone will not change their behavior. Rather, it will just let the other person know that they can control the way you feel by behaving that way, and thereby allow them to do so whenever they please.
What Being Free From The Erroneous Zones Look Like
In the last chapter of his book, Dr. Wayne Dyer talked about the behaviors that a person who is free from the erroneous zones will be exhibiting. These behaviors can be summed up as follows:
– Liking everything about life
– Does not engage in complaining
– Accepting of what is, of every present moment
– Free from guilt of the past or anxiety of the future, and is living fully in the present moment
– Ignoring you instead of being angry at you, and doesn’t get emotionally involved in problems
– Does not worry about things that he or she does not have control over
– Embracing uncertainty because it fuels growth
– Does not put happiness in a future event
– Encourages self reliance in relationships
– Does not look at external validation for his or her own worthiness
– Good at creating humor and laughter
– Accepting and loving of himself/herself, and has no time for self-pity
– Always curious and wants to learn more, not afraid to try and not afraid to fail either
P.S. If you woud like to get a copy of Your Erroneous Zones by Wayne Dyer, CLICK HERE for a direct link to Amazon (Available in Kindle version, Audiobook, and Paperback).
P.P.S. You can also watch our Playlist of some Wayne Dyer Motivational videos on Youtube HERE!
Blessings to you and Namaste 🙂
