Motivational guru Jim Rohn was famously quoted for saying you are the average of the five people you regularly interact or have close relationships with. That your thoughts, perspectives and behaviors are influenced by the types of people you choose to surround yourself often. Be it friendship, family or romantic relationships, choosing the right people is very vital in ensuring positive growth and well-being for yourself.
So what are the signs of a good relationship and how do you know if a relationship is healthy for you? How do you gauge if it adds value to your life, or if it’s doing more harm than good? In here I’ll be sharing with you ten characteristics of a healthy relationship– the qualities and signs that are present in the kind of relationship that will cultivate a healthy, positive atmosphere in your life.
#1. Each person in the relationship is responsible for his or her own happiness.
In this kind of relationship, the happiness of one is not dependent on what the other person is doing or not doing. When you are in this relationship, you know that you are the source of your own joy and happiness, and you do not put the burden or responsibility on the other person to make you happy. The relationship becomes a sharing of the happiness that is already there, instead of getting from the other person what you do not have to begin with. Instead of the relationship revolving around taking something from another, it becomes a mutual sharing of themselves, without dependency, responsibility or possession.
#2. Each person has a clear identity apart from the relationship, and knows himself or herself well.
Each person in the relationship has a solid foundation and stable knowing of who he or she is. When you are in this relationship, you do not lose yourself in it and you have a life outside of it as well. You are clear on your values, beliefs, and character, which are not controlled by any other. Each person is free to express opinions because there is mutual respect and honoring of individual identities. No one will be superior or inferior in the relationship as each one knows clearly his or her standards, and decides for his or her own happiness.
#3. The relationship enhances positive energies around you.
Being in this relationship lifts your spirits up. It is not draining you of your energy but rather you feel excited, enlivened, and uplifted every time you’re with them. It stimulates positive thoughts and ideas, and cultivates good habits in your lifestyle. The relationship promotes positive energies of joy, harmony and trust, and rejoices in what’s good.
#4. The relationship keeps you inspired to be your best.
This kind of relationship inspires and motivates you to be the best version that you can be. The other person clearly sees your potential and capabilities, and inspires you to focus on them rather than on the setbacks or pitfalls. The relationship amplifies and supports your strengths, and lets go of attention to weaknesses. It doesn’t point out the things you did wrong, but rather helps you improve and become better than before.
#5. There is genuine appreciation and gratitude for who you are.
In this relationship, the other person sees your value and worth as you are now. There is no feeling that you need to be different to be accepted or earn your worthiness. You are accepted and appreciated for all that you are now and all that you can be. There is a comfortable environment in the relationship where you feel at ease and relaxed being who you currently are, without feeling the need to prove or justify yourself in some way.
#6. The relationship promotes freedom and fun. It is non-controlling.
This relationship is liberating and recognizes the freedom that is inherent in every individual. Each person is free to follow his or her own bliss, without the other getting in the way of that joyful pursuit. The relationship allows the other person to evolve and grow in his or her own journey, without the need for pressure as to how things are supposed to be. There is a letting go insistence and releasing of control as you let the other person blossom into the most wonderful version that he or she can be.
#7. Each person supports individual growth and passions.
This kind of relationship is supportive of your well-being and is rooting for your progress and happiness. You are both moving forward in your lives, following your respective passions and calling, and fueling your growth in all areas of life. You are both journeying in the same direction towards greatness, neither one becoming intimidated or jealous of another.
#8. The relationship envisions a brighter future and is optimistic about where it is headed.
In this relationship, each person chooses to see the good in what life is bringing to the relationship and how it is evolving as time goes on. Each person extracts the positive in whatever they experienced inside the relationship and makes the best of every present moment together. It sees a bright future ahead for everyone involved and looks forward to many years of shared happiness and joyful expansion.
#9. The relationship expresses compassion and non-judgment.
You know you are in this relationship when the other person doesn’t judge you for your past mistakes and understands the process of evolution and transformation you are continuously going through in life. The relationship is built upon love, kindness and genuine care for your well-being, and sees you beyond the temporary mishaps in your life.
#10. The relationship is open to adventure and positive change.
A relationship that is healthy is embracing of positive changes and is not afraid of taking life’s adventures. Each person knows that nothing is static and so each one is in positive anticipation of new things that the relationship can expand into. The relationship doesn’t hang into old ways that no longer serve them, but rather is excited to move along the positive current of life.
Over to you…
Which of these 10 characteristics of a healthy relationship do you like best?
