What does it really mean to put yourself first?
To say in another way, what it means is putting “caring about the way you feel” first.
It means taking care of your happiness and your inner world first and foremost, making sure that you are in balance and replenished on the inside, before you get out into the world or into your day-to-day interactions, doing the myriad of things you have to do in your schedule.
It means saying yes to yourself before saying yes to others, and aligning your energies with your decision before taking any action. It’s making sure that you are full, loaded, energized and connected to your inner source of clarity and strength so that you have plenty to give away and not feel depleted or lifeless. Because harmony on the inside translates to harmony on the outside. This is based upon the fact that if you have no energy or life left inside of yourself, you will have nothing valuable to give to anyone anyway, and so helping others will all be useless.
The thing to keep in mind is to “help yourself first” before you become of help to anyone. To fill yourself up with loving, positive energies, and then become of value to someone. This is the same reason why aircraft policies require us to put our own oxygen masks first before trying to help others put on theirs. You need to secure yourself first before anything you do becomes of service to another.
Because you cannot give to another what you do not have to begin with. How can you be compassionate with other people if you are not compassionate with yourself? How can you give patience when you do not have it within you? How can you truly give love to another person when you are not loving yourself first? You always have to start with the source.
So how do you start putting yourself first in everyday circumstances?
Putting yourself first is like charging your batteries when it gets depleted. You are putting energy on yourself so you can do the things in your world with great efficiency and value. Doing this, you won’t be blaming your outer responsibilities for making you feel ineffective, but rather you will see first within yourself if you indeed have taken the time to replenish your energy. You will never feel like your responsibilities are taking advantage of you because you know you have already recharged at the onset.
Here are 5 habits / daily choices that you can adopt to make sure you’re recharged everyday:
1. At the start of each day, dedicate a “me” time when you first do things for yourself that make you feel good.
This could be taking the time to prepare a delicious breakfast for yourself and enjoy it while watching the sunrise at your front yard. Or it could be pampering yourself for a few minutes with a warm shower while listening to a relaxing music to set your mood for the day. Or it could be reading a few pages from an inspirational book you’ve bought for yourself and boosting your energy from the inside. This may require waking up a few minutes to an hour early so you can devote time for rejuvenation and greet your day with a fresher perspective, instead of rushing through your responsibilities as soon as you wake up.
2. Meditate or quiet your mind for a few minutes each day. This calms your body, mind and spirit, and provides the energetical and spiritual boost.
Similar to having a “me” time upon arising in the morning, you may choose to spend 15 to 20 minutes in meditation, which is just having no thoughts in your mind by focusing on your breathing, on a mantra, or on a specific sound. The purpose of this is for you to connect to the inner stillness and peacefulness inside of yourself so you will achieve more clarity and calmness as day-to-day situations come into your experience. This allows you to develop intelligent responses to your environment instead of unconsciously reacting to whatever is going on.
3. Do things that cultivate a positive mind and spirit.
Bring nourishment to your mind and soul by engaging in activities that add interval value. This could be reading or listening to self development and personal growth gurus during your free time. Or taking up online courses or seminars that fuel your passion on different areas of interest, and expand your knowledge on these subjects that feel meaningful for you.
4. Learn to say no to things that don’t align with you internally.
Everyday you will be bombarded with a lot of outside information that will require your focus and attention. And putting yourself first means consciously saying no to things that do not serve your happiness and that you feel are draining you on the inside. Practice listening to your inner signals and choose to give attention only to things that add life-giving energies to who you truly are. In this way, you are releasing things that could potentially bring your energy down.
5. Eliminate mental clutter by putting your energy on things that are truly important.
The chaos and noises on the outside need not be taken on the inside. When you decide not to participate in the unnecessary drama, complaints, arguments and debates about all kinds of things around you, you maintain your energy balance and you retain more of yourself for things that truly matter in your life.
In putting yourself first, you are keeping your inner light shining, and you are becoming a positive catalyst for others to bring forth their own light as well.
Your Turn…
What other habits or daily choices can you think of on how to start putting yourself first? Share your thoughts in the comment box below!
P.S. My book 100 Habits For Self Love is now on Amazon Kindle!
Discover 100 positive mindset habits and daily self-care actions you can adopt and practice in your everyday life. You may check it out on Amazon here 🙂
